Friday, 3 November 2017

Adolescent rebellion: It’s the poster characteristic of the teenager years

It's the poster characteristic of the teenager years: adolescent rebellion. And it's one that causes many conflicts with parents.
Two common types of rebellion are against socially fitting in (rebellion of non-conformity) and against adult authority (rebellion of non-compliance.) In both types, rebellion attracts adult attention by offending it.
The young person proudly asserts individuality from what parents like or independence of what parents want and in each case succeeds in provoking their disapproval. This is why rebellion, which is simply behavior that deliberately opposes the ruling norms or powers that be, has been given a good name by adolescents and a bad one by adults.
Serious rebellion typically begins at the outset of adolescence, and when it does many parents think this opposition is against them. They are usually mistaken. Rebellion is not against them; it is only acted out against them.
Rebellion at this age is primarily a process through which the young person rejects the old child identity that he or she now wants to shed to clear the way for more grown up redefinition ahead. Rebellion at this early adolescent age proclaims: "I refuse to be defined and treated as a child any more!" Now he knows how he doesn't want to be, but he has yet to discover and establish how he does want to be.
How should parents respond to strong rebellion at this stage? When requests are met with delay, use patient insistence to wear down resistance. And try to move the early adolescent from acting out to talking out. Begin by asking, "can you help me better understand what you need?" See if you can get the young person to put their feelings into words. Having been given a full hearing and having had his or her say, the young person may now be more inclined to let parents have their way.
In mid adolescence, during the late middle school and early high school years, most rebellion is about creating needed differentiation to experiment with identity and needed opposition to gather power of self-determination.
When parents feel hard-pressed by these acts of rebellion (breaking social rules, running with wilder friends, for example) they are best served by allowing natural consequences to occur and by repeatedly providing positive guidance. They do this by continually making statements about, and taking stands for, choices that support constructive growth.
Each time they do so, they provide the young person a fresh choice point to cooperatewith them. Particularly when rebellion pushes hardest, as it usually does in mid adolescence, it is the responsibility of parents to keep communicating a reference that will guide the young person down a constructive path of growing up. In the words of one veteran parent who had shepherded two adolescents through periods of high rebellion, "what it takes is the gentle pressure of positive direction relentlessly applied."
Excerpts from the article by Carl. E. Pickhardt in Psychology Today

No big fuss.This is what we do every day, prepare kids for life.

It was the end of term at Kirkkojarvi Comprehensive School in Espoo, a sprawling suburb west of Helsinki, when Kari Louhivuori, a veteran teacher and the school’s principal, decided to try something extreme—by Finnish standards. One of his sixth-grade students, a Kosovo-Albanian boy, had drifted far off the learning grid, resisting his teacher’s best efforts. The school’s team of special educators—including a social worker, a nurse and a psychologist—convinced Louhivuori that laziness was not to blame. So he decided to hold the boy back a year, a measure so rare in Finland it’s practically obsolete.

Finland has vastly improved in reading, math and science literacy over the past decade in large part because its teachers are trusted to do whatever it takes to turn young lives around. This 13-year-old, Besart Kabashi, received something akin to royal tutoring.

“I took Besart on that year as my private student,” Louhivuori told me in his office, which boasted a Beatles “Yellow Submarine” poster on the wall and an electric guitar in the closet. When Besart was not studying science, geography and math, he was parked next to Louhivuori’s desk at the front of his class of 9- and 10-year- olds, cracking open books from a tall stack, slowly reading one, then another, then devouring them by the dozens. By the end of the year, the son of Kosovo war refugees had conquered his adopted country’s vowel-rich language and arrived at the realization that he could, in fact, learn.

Years later, a 20-year-old Besart showed up at Kirkkojarvi’s Christmas party with a bottle of Cognac and a big grin. “You helped me,” he told his former teacher. Besart had opened his own car repair firm and a cleaning company. “No big fuss,” Louhivuori told me. “This is what we do every day, prepare kids for life.”

Excerpts from an article by LynNell Hancock for the SMITHSONIAN MAGAZINE

Rebellion in youth is not an act of independence. It is really an act of dependency.

Although the young person thinks rebellion is an act of independence, it actually never is. It is really an act of dependency. Rebellion causes the young person to depend self-definition and personal conduct on doing the opposite of what other people want.
That's why the antidote for rebellion is the true independence offered by creating and accepting a challenge - the young person deciding to do something hard with themselves for themselves in order to grow themselves. The teenager who finds a lot of challenges to engage with, and who has parents who support those challenges, doesn't need a lot of rebellion to transform or redefine him or herself in adolescence.
To what degree a young person needs to rebel varies widely. In his fascinating book, "Born to Rebel" (1997), Frank Sulloway posits that later born children tend to rebel more than first born. Some of his reasoning is because they identify less with parents, do not want to be clones of the older child or children who went before, and give themselves more latitude to grow in nontraditional ways. So, parents may find later born children to be more rebellious.

Many high school rebellions that I see occur as a result of delayed adolescence, the young person dramatically rebelling at last to liberate himself or herself from childhood dependency on parental approval for always being the "good child."
For example, only children are often slower to separate from parents because of strong attachment and protracted holding on by both sides. Finally in high school these young people, with graduation into more independence looming a year or two ahead, may need to initiate late stage rebellions to get the separation and differentiation and autonomy they need to undertake this next momentous step.
This is painful and scary for parents. At this older age, risk taking can be more dangerous, while they miss the loss of closeness and compatibility with their son or daughter that they have enjoyed for so many years.
What parents need to remember at this point is that the young person is just as scared and pained as they are. So their job is to allow more independence while expecting commensurate responsibility, staying empathetic during disagreements, and providing calm and clear guidance about any significant risk taking that may going on.
Having dethroned parental authority for leading her life and supplanted it with her own authority, she finds herself rebelling against it. It's like the young person is saying: "Nobody is going to order me around, not even me!"
For example, the young person knows he has to be on time for a job, but he can't make himself get up in the morning. The young person knows she has to study, go to class, and turn in assignments, but she can't make herself do the college work. Both he and she know they shouldn't drink so much at parties because of how they act and what they let happen, but in the company of friends they can't make themselves stop. The old Walt Kelly quote really captures this conflicted age: "We have met the enemy and they are us."
What can parents do at this point? They must let the consequences of the young person's resistant choices play out and not interfere. How to end this rebellion against self-interest and accept their leadership authority in life is the last challenge of adolescence. It must be met before young adulthood can truly begin.
Rebellion starts in early adolescence with the young person resisting parental authority by saying: "You can't make me!" Rebellion ends in the last stage of adolescence, trial independence, with the young person resisting personal authority by saying: "I can't make me!"
Excerpts from the article by Carl. E. Pickhardt in Psychology Today

Not lovin' it: McDonald's to shut down 43 of 55 outlets in Delhi temporarily

Global burger joint and India's favorite fast food chain, McDonald's is shutting its 43 outlets out of 55 in Delhi today. The tiff between CPRL (Connaught Plaza Restaurants) and US-headquartered McDonald's has taken a sour turn for the consumers as well as the employees. 
Vikram Bakshi, the former managing director of CPRL told ET, "It's unfortunate, but operation of 43 restaurants operated by CPRL has been temporarily suspended.”
CPRL operates 168 restaurants in total. The tiff between Bakshi and McDonald's has led to the shutting down of the outlets.
It was observed that the decision to shut down the outlets was taken via a Skype meeting on Wednesday and could leave 1,700 employees jobless.
But, according to an official statement released by McDonald's India Pvt. Ltd. (MIPL), the services by McDonald's are temporarily suspended for the operations of specific restaurants.
The temporary suspension is due to the expiration of the Eating House Licenses of specific restaurants. However, the Board of the CPRL is currently working to obtain the licenses need to comply with McDonald's regulatory standars.
The brand also ensured that CPRL is retaining the employees of affected restaurants and will pay them their salary during the period of suspension.
The former managing director of CPRL was removed from his position in August 2013. Ever since his removal, he was involved in a legal battle with the US-headquatered fast food chain. Bakshi was responsible for dragging McDonald's to Company Law Board (CPL). Although, the CPL verdict is still pending for the particular case.
McDonald's has also been pursuing arbitration against Bakshi in the London Court of International Arbitration.
Shutting down almost 80 per cent of its outlets might cause the American fast food chain to go in great loss, but the restaurant chain decided to do it anyway due to health and regulatory reasons.
It seems like the meal is not going to be that happy for Delhiites after India's favourite burger chain's decision to temporarily drop their cheesy services.

Swine flu scare: No morning assembly in UP schools

Till August 13 this year, 695 cases of swine flu had been reported in Uttar Pradesh. Of these, 21 have died.
The Uttar Pradesh government has asked all schools of the state to put on hold morning assemblies from tomorrow to prevent the spread of swine flu.
"An advisory has been sent to all the district magistrates and commissioners in the state asking them to put on hold morning assembly prayers in all private and government schools in view of the swine flu scare," principal secretary health and family welfare Prashant Trivedi told today.
The decision in this regard has been taken to check the spread of the disease and ensure that school children do not catch the infection, he said.
Till August 13 this year, 695 cases of swine flu had been reported in Uttar Pradesh. Of these, 21 have died, an official statement by the state director general, medical and health services has said.
To check the spread, the government has already formed district-level rapid response teams, which will consist of a public health specialist, a physician, an epidemiologist, a pathologist and lab technician.
"In all the district hospitals of the state, a 10-bed isolation ward has been established. The state surveillance unit and district surveillance unit are continuously monitoring the swine flu situation. Instructions have also been issued to combat any emergency-like situation pertaining to Influenza A (H1N1)," Trivedi said.
The officer said all the doctors and para-medical staff posted at the casualty wards and emergency wards who treat patients infected by H1N1 have been vaccinated.
"A toll free number 18001805145 has been activated. Apart from this, control rooms working round the clock are also being activated in various districts," he added. According to the director of communicable diseases, Dr Badri Vishal, patients have been categorised as 'A', 'B' and 'C' according to their symptoms as per the directives of the Centre.
Only patients in the C-category have to be admitted to hospitals. Those who complain of breathing difficulty, chest pain, drowsiness, low blood pressure, blood coming out with sputum and nails turning blue have been kept in the C-category.
Children who suffer from high fever, breathlessness and are not able to eat food have been put in the C-category, he said.
"However, those who complain of mild fever, cough, itching in throat, body pain, headache and diarrhoea need not undertake swine flu test. They come in the B-category. "They should refrain from public interaction. These patients should be under observation for 24 to 48 hours, and then their health condition be re-evaluated," he said.

If those in A-category complain of high fever and severe throat itching, they should be isolated in their houses, the director said.
Some of the ways to prevent the spread of swine flu are by staying home if a person is sick, washing one's hands thoroughly and frequently, covering mouth and nose while sneezing or coughing, staying away from crowds, and reducing exposure within the household.
Source : PTI